Stereotypes

I think the biggest issue in society are stereotypes. I mean honestly, we all have biases, opinions, perspectives, and views that are based off of stereotypes. For example, Asians are bad drivers. Let's face it, we have all had this thought whenever we see an Asian person driving, myself included. But this is an example of an issue that society has. Why is it that we base our own perspectives and opinions based upon a standard or norm that an imperfect society has bestowed upon us? Personally, I care a great amount about this issue because it has personally effected me. During this day and age, you would think that people would be comfortable with all races, however, one thing that I will always remember is going into a restaurant filled with predominantly Caucasian individuals and getting a shocked stare as I sit with my family. Many of these people had judgmental and confused looks on their face as they stared at my family, and I can honestly say it was awkward, embarrassing, and pretty humiliating. Just the possibility that this happens to people across the nation every single day makes my blood boil. What right do any of us have to judge another based on things we think we know about them? This is one thing that I have an issue with in society and also with myself. So far in my life, I have mainly focused on changing my internal perception of people. I feel that if I am personally able to change the way I view and assess people, then I will have the ability to influence others to do the same thing. To be honest, I am kind of a judgmental person which is not necessarily my best feature, and this is something that I am trying to change about myself. In the future, one of my dreams and aspirations is actually to create my own non-profit organization to educate society on societal issues. Something I am very passionate about are social campaigns. I believe that once people's awareness on different issues that affect societies across the globe, even ones that may seem entirely different than ours, then people will be able to change the negative aspects of our own society and embrace the positive ones. My ultimate goal in life is to create this non-profit and I truly hope that this is one dream that will come true in the future. For others that feel that this issue is also prevalent in our society, I encourage them to put themselves in another's shoes. Once one is able to truly see how another experiences discrimination, stereotypes, and judgment, empathy is absolutely a result. Putting one's self in another's shoes is crucial to experiencing true judgment.

To get a feel for how stereotypes affect our society take a look at this video titled "The Doll Test"

Communication

The key to being an effective and influential leader with any individual or group of individuals is communication. This is extremely necessary to be ensure that you are leading people and guiding them to reach a goal and outcome that is desired. Personally, my methods of communicating with an individual do not differ from my methods of communicating with a group. This is because I feel that one directly affects the way of communicating with another, so personally, if I can communicate with an individual, then I can communicate with a group and vice-versa. Although no being the most effective communicator, I do believe that I communicate well, and that it is not something that I lack.

My Top 5 Ways of Communicating with Individuals/Groups:

1. Tone. The way that you present something to others is so important to how it will be received. If you talk about something in a condescending tone or a way that makes your idea appear to be superior to others, then it will not be received well. One technique that I attempt to always do when I communicate with others is to say use a tone that is warm, polite, and respectful. After doing this, I am often received with praise, constructive criticism, or I am given a response that has a similar tone. I find that if I talk to someone in a way that I like to be spoken to, then this ultimately leads to a better way of communication with a group or an individual.
2. Constructive Criticism. Now, as leaders, one of the hardest things that we are forced to do is at times, point out an individual's or group's flaws or downfalls. One thing that I have found to be extremely effective is constructive criticism. While we all have flaws, having someone simply point them out really just makes us feel about ourselves. However, I have realized that while pointing out areas of improvement, if a leader also gives ways of improving this quality or other ideas that could make your strengths even stronger, then ultimately, the individual or group becomes aware of this area of improvement, yet also sees tangible ways that they can improve, 
3. Positive Reinforcement. One of the most effective communication techniques that I have seen is positive reinforcement. For me personally, I know that I always perform better once I get acknowledgment from another of the quality of my work (maybe this is me just wanting to boost my ego a little, but who knows really). So, positive reinforcement is something that I have always tried to incorporate whenever I find myself working with others. I find that if you give a little compliment on another's work or show recognition of a characteristic you admire in another, this will ultimately lead to better leadership in the end. Positive reinforcement not only allows a person to communicate recognition of the skills of another person, but it also allows for a better relationship between leader and the individual in the end.
4. Respect. Respecting others is key to communicating well with others. If you treat another with respect, usually they will do the same for you. So, by communicating with respect is essential to communicating well with an individual or group. It allows one to say all the strengths and the areas that need improvement of a body, while doing so in a manner that a person will understand and be able to grow from.
5. Example. I include "example" as a method of communication because it allows a leader to be a model for others to follow without directly telling others what they need to do. If one leads by example, then there is not always the need for them to tell others what needs to be done or what one should strive to be like. Leading by example is a way of indirect communication between leader and audience that, in my opinion, is just as effective as any other method of communication.

If a leader can follow each of these methods of communication, I am confident that they are truly an effective leader. Communication is key, and while there may not be methods of communication that work for everyone, there are definitely always methods of communication that fit each type of leadership style. 

This I Believe...

http://thisibelieve.org/essay/87000/

Ok, so this essay deals with integrity in leadership, and as I have expressed in many of my previous posts, integrity is a big thing for me. In fact, it is my most prominent value that I cherish above all others. Integrity, honor, pride--it all means the same thing to me, and it is something that can create or destroy one's respect for another. This author of this essay describes how integrity is the trait she looks for the most in a leader, and I completely agree. If a leader does not have integrity, I often have difficulty respecting and working with them. Also, this author talks about her experience of having a leader who did not have integrity, and this caused her to really look for someone who did have integrity as one who could lead her. I had a very similar experience in my high school leadership class, and having a leader who did not have integrity allowed me to discover that integrity is by far the most important value to me. Also, this author ends her essay with the statement, "I believe that you can choose to be the kind of leader that makes all things possible." This statement resonates deep within me because this is something that I often preach as a leader. As Student Body President at my high school, I often preached that each leadership student needed to discover what their personal legacy would be, how they would individually make a change. So, I completely connect with this author and agree with everything that she has to say. A leader is someone who not only inspires others and works to the best of their ability, but a leader is also someone who leads by example and proves that there are no limitations in life.

My Story:

I believe in integrity. I believe that a leader should be a beacon and stand as an example of trust, honor, and truth. This value has always been something that I have firmly believed in. While I believe that leaders must also be confident, inspire others, be charismatic, etc., integrity is the number one trait I look for in a leader that I can truly work with and respect.

My story begins as a young child growing up in an Asian household. Growing up as an Asian American, or just as an Asian for that matter, you learn quickly that family honor is the most important thing in your life. "Don't do anything that will shame the family," and "Remember your goal is always to honor the family," are two phrases that I heard so many times throughout my eighteen years that I cannot even count how many times I have heard it. I guess this is where I began really valuing integrity. Growing up with it constantly being driven into my very being pretty much affected my outlook on life and influenced the actions I took. Integrity has always been a huge aspect of my consciousness and it has been ground into every action and every thought I have that I now often look for this trait in others when I find someone I should treat with much respect. For a long time, it was only something that I kept in the back of my mind, something that would subconsciously influence the decisions that I made. This was until my father’s death in 2009. Like many, my parents were huge symbols of integrity and leadership for me. However, when my father was in the hospital, I distinctly remember my mother coming up to me and telling me that I was not allowed to tell anyone, including friends, teammates, etc. because she did not want the information getting out to anybody until we were certain of his status. Yet while I was not allowed to tell anyone, my sister had her two best friends and her boyfriend at the hospital with her and my mother also had her two best friends there. It has always confused me why I was the only one who was apparently “not allowed to tell anyone” while my other family members were free to tell whomever they wanted. This is where my view on integrity, pride, and honor truly took control of my perception. To this day, I still find it difficult to view my mother with integrity because of her actions during this time. Now, I am not saying that she isn’t a fantastic mother, but it is something that I constantly struggle with. Now, integrity, trust, honor—these have become the most valuable characteristics that I find in a true leader. I respect and look for those with integrity, while also trying to ensure that I live a life that is full of such and that my own personal integrity affects each action and thought that I have. Integrity is key to leading by example. It is essential to helping other discover their own leadership potential and unlocking true confidence in other people. With integrity, I believe that anything is possible. 

My Commitment

So for me, perhaps my biggest commitment is my commitment to my friendships. This friendship is perhaps the friendship that I have committed the most to and that means the most to me personally. These two friends, Jamie and Jayson, are two of my best friends. The three of us trust each other 100%, are always there for each other during times of need, and always create unforgettable memories together. With this friendship, I have had the opportunity to truly test and identify many of my most cherished values.
1. Community. This was one of my core values as well as the name I used to group together other values like friendship, close relationship, influencing others, and quality relationships. I can honestly say that my friendships with Jayson and Jamie involve all of these values. They have both taught me so much about what it means to be a good friend and a good person in general. From them, I have learned that close friends are not necessarily only people who you can always have a good time with, but close friends are those that are there for you during times of need, during times when you are at your worst, and are there to tell you when you really mess up and need to get your act together. They have influenced me so much and have allowed me to truly grow into one who values friendship above all else. They are truly my rocks and are always there to keep me grounded.
2. Growth. Now, if there are any people who have really helped me grow as a person, it would be these two. As  I said before, these two have taught me so much about how to be a good friend and how to have quality friendships, and because of them, I have grown so much in this area. They have helped me understand the person that I want to be and really helped me define what I believe a true friend to be.
3. Adventure. What is a friendship if you all can't have a little bit of fun and adventure together? It's funny because whenever I tell my mom about my adventures or fun times that I've had with these two, she always says just one thing: "You are all joined at the hip," and she laughs and walks away. I have had some of my most cherished experiences, embarrassing encounters, funny mistakes, and some of my most fun memories with these two, and whenever I am with them, it is always an adventure. We all share a similar sense of humor, and we tend to bring out the best in one another. Not only are we joined at the hip, but our little group is a cohesive interaction of three unique personalities.

 

Throughout my lifetime, I have only had one instance where my values have been challenged in a sense. When my father passed away when I was thirteen, much information about my father's death was kept from me because I was at such a young age. There were aspects about his death, the reasons for his death, and the events that happened after his death that I was completely unaware of because my family decided that it was best for me not to know. After learning the truth about his death, I was angry. Not only was I lied to in a sense, but I felt betrayed by my very own blood. At the time, I was full of resent and anger, and it was hard for me to truly feel comfortable with my family again. After such, this is when my value of integrity began to take form. Honor and truth--essentially all of these fall under the same category of integrity and this is what I value above all else. I find that in all aspects of my life, I hold integrity as a value above all else, and that if someone does not fit in this value, I often do not associate myself with them or have a lowered sense of respect for them. Integrity is by far my most cherished value, and from my experience where this was broken, I have learned that I hold this value with the utmost importance and will do anything to preserve it.

Values and Congruence 101 with Timon and Pumbaa

Now, when you watch this video, you may start to think, "Wow, why is he showing me this dumb clip from a movie I used to watch when I was a kid." However, this scene is one of the most powerful and influential videos that I have ever witnessed. This video clip connects especially to me because friendship and integrity are some of my most valued traits. During the exercise in class the other day, we did an activity where we enumerated some of most valued people, traits, and experiences, and eventually, we weeded out the ones that we did not deem worthy enough. When it came down the last three valuables, my top two were my two things that I believe and treasure the most: friendship and honor. In the video, Timon and Pumbaa, stars in Disney's "The Lion King," define and exemplify the ultimate friendship based on trust, experience, and love for one another. Their bond emerges as the two grow with one another and become true friends. My belief is that friends are some of the most treasured of all beings during one's lifetime. Also, as I stated in my introductory blog, I think that friends are the family that you can choose--the ones that support people during times of uncertainty and are loyal during times of distress. Timon and Pumbaa's bond is such of a closely knit family. Also, it shows the value of honor. For me, honor, as in family honor and pride in one's self, is something that the two characters definitely did not lack on. They showed honor as they took in a complete stranger because he had been exiled or removed from his home, and by nurturing the growing friendship, they begin to take pride and honor in their relationships with one another. They were like a cohesive family.
This video especially rings true to me because I personally believe that friendships are essential and absolutely necessary to surviving the peril that we call "life." I truly enjoy this video because it also represents the loving, and deep connection between the two because they have chosen to be much more than just each other's friends, but as having great pride in their friendship.
I feel very connected to my selected clip because "The Lion King" is one of my favorite childhood movies. I have always loved this film, and by loving the movie, I knew immediately which clip I wanted to use. Also it portrays many values and morals that I have throughout the film and allude to many lessons that I too try to exemplify. Also, the clip represents those who we all love and what each individual will do to protect that relationship.
In order to ensure that the meaning portrayed in "The Lion King," I try to live by their example. They show the true essence of a friendship and what it takes to be content and happy with that friend. Each and every day I try to build stronger friendships with each of my friends to build stronger bonds between us. I try to live the lifestyle that has been portrayed thanks to Timon and Pumbaa's example of an incredible friendship. My hope is that by working with congruence to the value I place on friendships and strong bonds with those who one cares about, more people with treasurer and love there relationships just as much as I do.

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator

"When we put people in boxes where they can only be one or another, we miss the opportunity to see people as diverse as they are."

Thinking about this quote, I think that this is very true. Each person has multiple personality traits, characteristics and tendencies that make up who they are, no matter if it fits into one specific reference frame or another. I do not think that anyone can necessarily put one person into category A or category B. Yes, I agree that we all have inherent personalities that overshadow other aspects of ourselves, but saying that people can only be in this category or that category based one traits x,y, and z, is something I do not agree with.

Doing so personally makes me feel like I am in a prison--that I am confined to only certain characteristics because I am who I am. I believe that every individual is unique in their own way with characteristics that cover the entire spectrum. I personally feel like I am this way. As an introvert, there are definitely times where I feel physically drained and overwhelmed with certain situations, and I am not one to necessarily become exhilarated by interaction with others. However, this does not necessarily mean that I do not have instances in time or certain characteristics that display the tendencies of an extrovert. Overall, I believe that people are too diverse to be forced into categories that they may not necessarily embody entirely.

In my opinion, all of the MBTI characteristics are looked at fairly equally. While many accept that there are great differences between the different MBTI traits, when creating an effective and cohesive team, choosing people from people with all characteristics on the MBTI. Virtually all people with an array of MBTI characteristics are valued in some way and all have their certain strengths and weaknesses that balance out each other. 

In the perfect society, one would believe that society would accept and value diverse people that do not fit into any category or type. However, in some instances, there are times where I feel that society values the more charismatic and logical thinkers. These are people who are extremely personable and are able to make clear cut decisions without letting feelings or hesitations get in the way. In many instances, these kinds of people are able to gain the glorification of people across the world. Very rarely are true introverts and feelers celebrated as much as the charismatic and loved extroverts. There are of course many exceptions, but as a whole, I believe that society favors these kinds of people. 

For instance, take Kim Kardashian. She is a very influential extrovert who much of society idolizes and celebrates. She is undoubtedly looked and favored upon because of her charismatic and sociable behavior, and it is only because of this kind of personality that she is favored throughout society.

A true leader is one who can see all the differences in his or her group to see all of their personality types. It is only in understanding each of these differences that one is able to utilize their group to their fullest potential. If they are able to see all the strengths and weaknesses and understand how each group member balances out the other, then the group becomes a cohesive and truly effective team. It is only by understanding their group members that leaders are able to be in that leadership role. 

Heroic Leadership

For me to become the most successful leader, my goal is to use the Heroic Leadership model to its fullest capabilities. In order to use a model like this, key aspects like integrity, commitment, and selflessness are imperative. However, my favorite aspect of this leadership is something that almost no other leadership model has--love. It is such a simple thing, yet for many in leadership roles, has no position whatsoever. How can leaders lead without knowing who they are leading, by having compassion for those who they represent, or showing understanding for the obstacles and triumphs that others face? It is not only the inclusion of love that makes this leadership model the most appealing. Essentially, the Heroic Leadership model is the art of influencing others to their personal best in any task or project by putting their needs and your goal's needs above your own. Shouldn't this be the goal of any leader? I think that meeting a goal or ensuring that your team performs to their highest potential outweighs any personal issues that one may have.The key to being a truly great leader is bringing out each individual's true potential, that one thing that clicks for them so that they, along with the rest of your team, can succeed in their own personal way. I love this aspect of the Heroic model because what could be better than seeing others succeed and blossoming into truly inspiring people.

Now, I'm pretty sure we can all agree the Optimus Prime represents the Heroic Leadership model perfectly. He leads his team of Autobots with integrity, valor, and love, caring for each one without limits. He is a true example of why this leadership model is awesome! (Sorry for geeking out a little).

Although I find myself leaning towards this leadership model, I do have some hesitations and reservations about it. My one question is: how does one forgo their own personal desires, wants, and agendas completely solely for the benefit of others? Now, maybe this is just me being selfish, but I don't know if I would be able to completely let go of everything that I want and all of my own personal goals just to ensure that others are able to accomplish theirs. I mean, we all have goals, so how are we individually supposed to succeed if we have to give up our own goals every time someone else is in need? 

Being in student body president in high school, there were many times where I had to give up my own personal ideas because other members of my government team had ideas that would benefit the everyone instead of just a select few. Also, there were many times where I spent my own personal time to help others with their plans, ideas, and events reach true success. Also, here at Santa Clara, I'm in Associated Student Government, and part of the role is being able to work with others collaboratively. Part of that is being able to understand other peoples' mentalities when it comes to planning different events or when trying to create beneficial change on campus to better meet a group's expectations. Being in such leadership roles, I am definitely starting to get used to this idea that in order for leaders to reach their fullest potential, the idea of love and compassion needs to take form. 

I think this picture connects really well with the Social Change model. We are all individuals with different personalities, ideas, cultures, and more, however, when we come together and collaborate without discrimination, our world truly creates something special. We need to work together not only individually or within small groups, but our actions are all interwoven with the rest of our communities. By having common values and by working together, we accomplish the impossible!